In Chioma's Mind. They say the human mind is a story that can never be completely told. Well my mind is a story just beginning. I just want you to take my hand as i lead you through the enchanting and exhilirating of Chioma's mind... *N.B: THIS IS SEMI-FICTITIOUS BLOG, ANY RELATIONS TO REAL PEOPLE, PLACES,TIME AND EVENTS ARE BLOWN WAY OUT OF PROPORTION (follow me on twitter- @itzmrsbosslady )
Saturday 23 April 2011
Friday 22 April 2011
Thursday 21 April 2011
THE HEALING PROCESS
Yesterday, I went on my first date in three months. It may seem like nothing special to you, but for me, it was like a breath of fresh air. Let me explain; exactly three months ago, I took a bold step in my life and ended a three year relationship. Before then if someone had walked up to me and said “hey, someone broke my heart”, I would have gone “Big deal, get over yourself”. But truth be told the taste of the pudding really is in the eating.
For two whole weeks I stay home all day by my self and at night I would cry myself to sleep. When my friends came a calling, I would give an excuse not to go out then cry some more. Later on, I would go out and whenever the issue of men or relationships arose, I would dismiss it with such bitter statements as “he was a jerk anyway”, “it’s his loss not mine” or “men are such idiots”. I thanked God that my friends didn’t blame or argue with me at the time. They knew I was in emotional pain and shouldn’t be held accountable for my words.
At a party one evening, my friends introduced me to pretty, young banker named Charlene*. I couldn’t help but notice that she kept saying this guy is cute and that guy is checking me out. When the men came along, she was totally at ease with them. I asked my friends about her and they told me she just went through a bitter divorce with her husband which left her in partial custody of her three year old boy. I felt sorry for her and when she came back to the table I held her hand and said comfortingly, “it’s not you dear, men are all trash.” “No they are not” she replied matter-of-factly,”You’ve got to heal yourself.”
Later that night as I lay in my bed, unable to sleep, I started thinking about the healing process. According to Charlene*, the healing process was a way to positively get rid of your hurt and feel better about yourself. Easy for her to say, I thought to myself indignantly, she didn’t know what I had been through. But, I knew she was so right.
In my case, it wasn’t just letting go, it was the fear that I may never find another person like my ex. I briskly got out of bed and sat at my reading table, it was time to go to work on my emotional pain. I felt the tears painfully welling up in my eyes as I titled the sheet of paper; FIVE GREAT THINGS I LOVE ABOUT MY EX. Then I started writing, the way you smile and spread your arms when we meet……
Thirty minutes later, I had filled the first page with beautiful thoughts as well as my tears. I had a smile on my lips as I kept thinking; this IS much harder than I thought. I held up the paper that was now numbered 1 to 10 and after a brief moment, put it away. I drew another sheet and titled it; FIVE GREAT THINGS I LOVE ABOUT ME. I finally had to stop myself over an hour and two sheets later. The tears were gone and I even had on a satisfied smile.
As I returned from my date yesterday, I looked at my image in the mirror and smiled to myself. Although some part of my face was covered by two sheets of paper that bore my handwriting, I knew that letting go of my hurt was all the beauty treatment I needed.
For two whole weeks I stay home all day by my self and at night I would cry myself to sleep. When my friends came a calling, I would give an excuse not to go out then cry some more. Later on, I would go out and whenever the issue of men or relationships arose, I would dismiss it with such bitter statements as “he was a jerk anyway”, “it’s his loss not mine” or “men are such idiots”. I thanked God that my friends didn’t blame or argue with me at the time. They knew I was in emotional pain and shouldn’t be held accountable for my words.
At a party one evening, my friends introduced me to pretty, young banker named Charlene*. I couldn’t help but notice that she kept saying this guy is cute and that guy is checking me out. When the men came along, she was totally at ease with them. I asked my friends about her and they told me she just went through a bitter divorce with her husband which left her in partial custody of her three year old boy. I felt sorry for her and when she came back to the table I held her hand and said comfortingly, “it’s not you dear, men are all trash.” “No they are not” she replied matter-of-factly,”You’ve got to heal yourself.”
Later that night as I lay in my bed, unable to sleep, I started thinking about the healing process. According to Charlene*, the healing process was a way to positively get rid of your hurt and feel better about yourself. Easy for her to say, I thought to myself indignantly, she didn’t know what I had been through. But, I knew she was so right.
In my case, it wasn’t just letting go, it was the fear that I may never find another person like my ex. I briskly got out of bed and sat at my reading table, it was time to go to work on my emotional pain. I felt the tears painfully welling up in my eyes as I titled the sheet of paper; FIVE GREAT THINGS I LOVE ABOUT MY EX. Then I started writing, the way you smile and spread your arms when we meet……
Thirty minutes later, I had filled the first page with beautiful thoughts as well as my tears. I had a smile on my lips as I kept thinking; this IS much harder than I thought. I held up the paper that was now numbered 1 to 10 and after a brief moment, put it away. I drew another sheet and titled it; FIVE GREAT THINGS I LOVE ABOUT ME. I finally had to stop myself over an hour and two sheets later. The tears were gone and I even had on a satisfied smile.
As I returned from my date yesterday, I looked at my image in the mirror and smiled to myself. Although some part of my face was covered by two sheets of paper that bore my handwriting, I knew that letting go of my hurt was all the beauty treatment I needed.
Wednesday 20 April 2011
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